Tardis Cake

It's Spiff's 31st birthday today!  Happy Birthday to a great guy!  

We love Dr. Who in our house.  So when I came across this awesome Tardis cake online one day, I knew it would be the perfect birthday gift for Spiff.  I'm such a newbie at caking, and it took me months of planning to pull this off.  I moved away from my sister and all of her cake supplies, so I had to purchase my own supplies.  Then, since it was a special design, I had to buy some special tools and supplies.  I enlisted my graphic designer friend to format the text for me.  I almost can't believe that it turned out so well!

It started out like this.  

This puppy is 16 layers (4 cake mixes!  Spiff's traditional birthday treat is a lemon meringue pie, so I made him a lemon cake), four cake boards, and supported with Bubble Tea straws.

At this point, it looks like a Dr. Seuss hat that could never be an awesome cake.

*Note that Square in the corner.  I bought that at the hardware store for $4 in order to frost the tall cake.  It turned out to be the most invaluable tool for making this cake.  I could not have done it without it.  Money well spent.

Two batches of buttercream frosting and hours of straightening later, and we have this beautiful straight-edged column!

I used the Aussie Smoothing technique to get the sharp corners.

It took me about two hours to cut out these panels for the side of the cake.

I used this wax-paper transfer technique for applying the fondant to the cake.  Loved this technique!

All four panels on the cake...finally.

Top, corners and signs on!

And done!

I used the wax-paper technique to put the window panels on, too.  It saved me a huge headache!  I will use it for any pattern I ever put on a cake.

And Ta-Da!!!  Here's the finale!  Complete with candles, cobblestone-covered cake board that I painted with color dust, and David Tennant himself (dressed as Christopher Eccelston, for any Dr. Who junkies who will question that detail).  If you look closely, there's even a little light on top, although it didn't show up very well.  I bought a pack of tiny LED fingerlights online for 48 cents in order to put a working light on the top of Spiff's cake.

My lessons-learned on this cake:

1.  Caking is way more fun and goes a whole lot faster with a buddy.  I miss my sister!

2.  A 16-layer cake requires a whole lot of frosting.

3.  This marshmallow fondant recipe worked like a dream, as long as you only add 1 1/2 pounds of powdered sugar to the melted marshmallows, not the full 2 pounds.  It was perfect.

4.  Swiss-meringue buttercream frosting melts in a warm kitchen.  It's very stable as long as it's cold. As soon as it warms up, though, the frosting will melt and the cake will get bubbles.

5.  A fondant-covered cake that is stored in the refrigerator will sweat and be tacky when removed from the fridge and warmed.  You are not supposed to touch the fondant until it stops sweating.  If your kitchen is too warm, like mine, then the frosting will start melting, and you realize that you need to get that cake back in the fridge ASAP, but you need to get it on the cake board, which was the reason you got it out of the fridge in the first place.  You will smash your carefully-created, sweated-over cake with a huge handprint while transferring it onto your cake board if you handle it while it is sweaty and gooey.  This will also make you mad and want to cry.  The lesson here is this:  Transfer the cake onto the cake board while it is still cold, directly out of the fridge.  You can touch the cake while it is still cold.  Then you can put it back in the fridge before it all starts to melt.  You will wish you had thought of that after you are trying to repair the damage to the cake from that ginorous handprint.

I'm so happy with how it turned out, and I am happy to have poured so much creative energy into something that I gave to my wonderful Spiff.  I sure do love him a whole lot.

The Word Switch

It has happened!  Hobbesie's little word switch has gone off.

It all started on a little family camping trip we took a few weeks ago.  Gunner, Hobbes and I were snuggling down in the tent, reading books, and trying to get the kids settled down for bed (an almost impossible task when we're camping!!!).  Gunner and I sang a Raffi sing-along book of "The Wheels on the Bus" to Hobbes.  I remember this book being a favorite of Gunner when he was Hobbes's age.  The next day, after we got home from our little trip, Hobbes found the book lying on the floor, picked it up, and said, "Rouw rouw rouw."  Over and over.

Since then, it has been about three new words each day.  I love this phase of baby.  It's so fun to finally hear what's going on in their little minds.

Yesterday, we were playing outside in the yard with balls, and I heard this complete phrase, 

"Mama, baba down."

So awesome that he can finally tell me that he needs help because the ball he was playing with fell down through the stairs, and he can't reach it.

I seriously love this kid.

I Am a Mother

Okay, I'm baring my soul here, people.  Please bear with me.

I have been thinking a lot about motherhood lately.  I have been struggling a lot with my job: my kids, feelings of inadequacy, lack of motivation, loneliness, fatigue, anger, lack of control, guilt, and the monotony of taking care of my children and house.  It feels like an never-ending cycle of preparing food, trying to get the kids to eat it, and then cleaning it all up.  Five times every day.  My sweet little Hobbes is the worst eater.  He would much rather play with his food than eat it.  It is always, Always smeared all over his tray, his shirt, his face and hair, and all over the floor.  And I am going to admit that I hate cleaning it up fives times a day.  And at the end of the day, when I'm cleaning it up again, the monotony of it all gets to me. I feel a flood of all of those negative emotions, I'm feel tired when I'm doing bedtime with the kids, and then I am not at my best with my children.  My poor, wonderful children who deserve the best from me at all times.

My good friend wrote a beautiful post on Mother's Day.  She wrote about how natural it is for her to be a mother, like she was created for this specific purpose.  I have thought about that often and thought how lucky she is.  How lucky to be so natural at something that is so all-consuming in life, and something that is so very important.

I have also felt a bit envious because I have never felt that.  I have always wanted to feel that, but I never have.  I always wanted to be a mom.  I always thought I would be great at it, that I would love every moment, that there was nothing else I could ever do.  Then I had Gunner.  He was so hard from the very beginning, and I suffered from severe PPD.  Gunner continues to be a challenge.  I still struggle almost every day, and I have realized that I'm not what I always hoped I would be.  Mothering has never felt natural to me.

It is hard for me.  There are days that I don't think I can continue.  There are days I want to quit.  There are days I think my children deserve better than me.  There are days I think I should get a full-time job and hire professionals to care for my kids because they would do a better job.

My friend, Chelsey, just wrote a great post about stay-at-home-moms.  What impressed me about this post was how she described her desire to raise her children.  She wants memories and good relationships with her children.  She chooses to stay at home with her kids because it is the best thing for her family.  She takes pride in her job and does everything she can to do her best.

Lately, I have had to redefine what I want from this role in my life, what I want to give, and how I want to accomplish it all.  I have talked with Spiff.  I have gone to the Lord for help.  I am still working it all out.  I desperately want to be a good mom.  I want my decision to stay home with my kids to truly be the best thing for my family.  I want my kids to know how much I love them and that they are so very special.  I want to have good relationships with them so that I can help them become the very best they can be.  I want to be able to look past this difficult phase of young kids needing me constantly and see my boys as responsible, happy, healthy adults.  Because that's what it's all about, isn't it?  Helping our children become self-sufficient contributing members of society.  And hopeful ones who will return home often and hug their proud mama.

If you read Chelsey's post, then you read this next part already.  In case you didn't read it, I'm posting it here.  I just loved the advice she passed on from a friend.  It encompasses so many things I struggle with as a mother.  It shows me that I am not alone in my feelings.  It reminds me that I have tools to work with when things are hard.  I have printed this out to post in my home.  I will read it every day until it becomes so much a part of me that I hopefully won't have to work so hard to be better at mothering.

I am a mother.  It was my choice to have children, and it is my choice what kind of a mother I will be.  I choose to try my best for my children.

1. In homemaking and mothering, what matters most is that your home is happy. If you have to let everything else go to get this one thing right, you will have traded well.

2. Kids can't hurry. They try, but...they fail. (I usually like to move at Cheetah Speed, in accomplishing household things and running errands. Let's get it done. I wait for no man. But doing things with little kids has turned my cheetah into one who one only has three legs, one of which is broken and one of which is five inches shorter than all the others. And also the cheetah is carsick, and shedding weird patches of hair, and drooling a lot. Whatever. Anyway, it's inefficient and s-l-o-w.) If you can only accomplish something by hurrying, don't. It is not worth the frustration that will ensue. Try again on a different day when you have more time.

3. No phase (or day) lasts forever. To me this is a reminder to breath it in deeply when it's fun and let it go with a sigh, when it's hard. This, too, shall pass.

4. It's easier to preempt a problem than to deal with its aftermath. (Following this advice could mean almost anything...hiding extra diapers in the car, giving D a nap when he has to stay up late for E's baseball game, separating tired children at the dinner table because they WILL start fighting if they're sitting next to each other, packing a snack or some crayons and paper if we're going to be out for a while, etc.) It is worth the time it takes to look at a situation that you know will push your limits and say, "What will make it hard? How can I make the hard stuff easier?"

5. Sometimes (a lot of times) the kid who did the hitting needs to be held even more than the one who got hit.

6. Be consistent. Follow through with consequences. Do something when you're counting and you actually get to "3". No means no. And praise, praise, praise the good stuff!

7. Smile at your husband and children. Just out of the blue, for no reason other than that they exist, they are yours, and that is a blessing. Wink. Mouth a silent, "I love you." Consistent, small displays of affection go a long way.

8. Pray together with your kids. Especially when you are grasping at sanity and self-control. Gather them around you, hold hands, and pray, even if you have to sob your way through it. Tell God that you are having a hard time. That you can't think clearly or don't know what to do. Ask Him--right there, out loud in front of your children--for forgiveness, to give you more love for your family, for help becoming a better mother. I've tried this a number of times. Every time, I have been changed. I finish praying and my instinct is to draw my children to me, hold them, apologize, and express my love to them. We get up and we try again, but it is better. Different. This is a magical piece of advice from a very dear friend. I wish I remembered it more often.

9. Admit when you blew it. Tell your kids you're sorry. My great sister-in-law put herself in time-out once after she lost her temper...chair facing the wall, timer on and all. Kids learn from parental mistakes and how they're handled. They are quick to forgive. Apologizing to them teaches them to apologize, and that everybody makes mistakes.

10. If you need time to yourself to get stuff done, you can usually get it by spending some undistracted time with your kids first. I read once about a mom who swore that if she took 15 minutes helping her kids get started in a play game (building a couch fort, making a Lego creation, helping them put on dress up clothes and makeup, gathering sticks and rocks for a pretend campsight, etc.) they would then play happily with that thing, alone, for at least 45 minutes. Fifteen minutes buys you forty-five. Not bad. I've tried this one a lot--it usually works nicely. Also, turns out it's super fun to forget about the phone and the laundry for a little bit and just play with your kids. Like a kid.

11. You're doing better than you think you are. If your kids know you love them, and if you're just trying to do a good job, that's enough. Forgive yourself for the stuff you aren't getting right quite yet.

My New Costco Problem

I love Costco.  I love shopping there.  I admit to having a Costco Problem.  I developed my problem over the last year.  I spent more money at Costco, and less at my local grocery store.  I felt guilty about the large amounts of money spent there, but enjoyed the delicious food and fully-stocked pantry we had in our home.  I dragged my boys to Costco 2-3 times per week.

My new problem is that there is not a Costco here.  Not yet.

Not until November 16.

There is a Sam's Club here, and Maggie has agreed to let me go with her sometimes.  I'm incredibly grateful for that.  But I'm holding out for a membership for when Costco opens.  How am I going to make it three more months?

Oh, Costo, how I miss you!  How I miss your $5 rotisserie chickens!  How I miss your delicious try-outs!  How I miss buying crackers and toilet paper in bulk!  How I worry that I will run out of my favorite Kirkland brand garbage bags before you open!  How I dislike buying everything at the grocery store!!!  Everything is so small and expensive there.  I feel like they are sucking me dry with every food purchase.

I can do this.  Three more months.  Those construction guys better not slack off.  I'm expecting a prompt grand opening, and I'll be there at the door.

Grief

My mind and heart are grieving today for a sweet family friend who lost her husband last week in a tragic accident.  He and his 6-year-old daughter took their motorcycle on a ride around the block.  They hit a car driven by a drunk driver who ran a stop sign.  The daughter was thrown clear (she tells people that her daddy threw her off the motorcycle) and miraculously came away with a few bumps and bruises.

Today, Emilie is burying her husband and the father of her five small children.  My heart is broken for her and her family.

My family is all attending the funeral this morning.  I wish I could be there to grieve with them and show my support for these people who were so important to me during all the years I lived at home.

I am so grateful for the Gospel this day.  I am so grateful for forever families and for knowing that Emilie's children will get the chance to know their daddy in the afterlife.  I am grateful that I will be with my family for eternity.  I am also reminded that anything can happen, and that we need to try out best to show our gratitude for our loved ones every day.  

Things He Says and Things We Do

Our two friends we have here in this new little town are both on vacation.  When Gunner found out that both Tommy and Charlotte & Greg were going out of town, he got so sad.  "But I won't have any friends to play with!"

And then he spent few days in a row being super naughty.  Super naughty.  It was miserable.  He was just in the worst mood, doing all sorts of things he knows he's not supposed to, fighting with Hobbes constantly, throwing tantrums of all shapes and sizes, ect.  After a few days of this, I finally asked him, "What's going on with you?  Why are you being so naughty?"

His reply: Charlotte is on a trip, and I miss her.

So, that's it.  We got to the bottom of that one.  Apparently, his behavior is directly related to how much fun he thinks he is going to have with his friends.  No friends = a big case of the naughties at home.

He seems to have snapped out of it, and we're back on track here in Casa Spiff. The kids are getting along better.  All moods are bright.  I have been making efforts to make new friends.  I even cleaned my house yesterday.  Think all laundry cleaned, folded and put away, all bathrooms cleaned, and ALL floors cleaned.  I am a rockstar.

We went on a little family campout last weekend.  We tested Spiff's spiffy REI tent in a real deluge, and it passed with flying colors.  There was a huge storm that rolled in around 11 pm, and it lasted until 8 in the morning.  There were at least four thunderstorms that came through, and it rained all night.  I kept waiting for it to rain less hard, and then it would rain even harder!  It was a storm that caused all sorts of damage up and down the state.  And our tent didn't get a single drop of water in it.  That's a good tent.

In other news, I am still recovering from my running injury.  I have run just a couple times in the last month, under two miles, all really really slowly.  I am still sore and aching, and I'm trying to take it slow as I hopefully get back into it and recover completely.  In the meantime, I am struggling to get good cardio workouts without being able to run, bike (I don't have one), or swim (I can't swim).  I have been doing workout videos in my living room.  My arms are a lot stronger form all the strength training, but I miss the cardio benefits of running.

For a couple of months, I had a good routine of cycling through the workouts available on Netflix.  And then one day, I woke up to find the message that they were going to be available only through August 1.  Total bummer!  So, I got online and bought myself a few new videos.  Since we have become fans of the Biggest Losers in our little house, I decided to try out the Biggest Loser workouts.

As I did one this morning, Gunner woke up and started participating with me.  I guess Gunner didn't realize it was a home workout video.  As Bob gave instructions into the camera, Gunner looked incredulous and said, "He pointed at me!  He's looking at me!  Why is he talking to me?!"

Love it.

Gunner the Author

Gunner wrote the following story as part of his Summer Reading program activities.  I shouldn't be surprised, since the kid has a vivid imagination, but I have to admit that I was surprised he was able to spit this thing out in about 20 seconds.  I think he would dedicate this story to his friend, Greg, who loves Monster Trucks.  Enjoy!

A Really Monster Story

by Gunner Archibald

A long time ago, a monster truck crushed a car.  A person jumped on the monster truck.  The person flicked the monster truck up in the air.  The monster truck crushed a house, and then it saw a big big alligator that had 42 teeth.  Then the crocodile ate the monster truck.

The End

New Stuff

So, my RS lesson went well last week, thanks to all of you who gave me great ideas.  I love my friends.

And now you might ask, "How are things going for you and Spiff in your new city?"  You might not ask, but if you do, I'll tell you.

Spiff is working so hard these days.  Intern year was rough.  He worked all the time.  And now he's here at his residency, and he's working just as hard.  Here is his schedule at the moment:
4:30 Wake up, get ready for the day.
4:50 Out the door, riding his bike to work.
5:15 Get to work, change, get ready.
5:30-3:00ish In OR for the day.  Maybe a lunch around lunchtime.  Maybe not.  If so, then straight back to OR.
3-5:00 Attend a 6-week afternoon lecture series.
5:30ish Arrive home.
6:00ish Eat Dinner.
6-7:00 Play with kids, help get them ready for bed.
7-8:30 Study
8:30 In Bed.

As you can see, he's booked.  So so so busy!  He is learning anesthesia now.  He is expected to know a whole lot of stuff right off the bat, and it's a pretty steep learning curve.  It's stressful, and he's tired.


I am remembering how not awesome it is to be the new girl.  The women in our ward are nice, but there aren't too many in my situation.  In fact, I looked around in RS on Sunday and realized that I was the only woman there who is my age!  There are a lot of 20-something cuter-than-cute single girls (Side note: The young singles are in our ward, which puts Spiff in the Elder's Quorum with only 4 other married Elders, and us having the most kids.  Weird.), and there are a lot of 40/50-something already-raised-their-kids ladies.  Not a lot my age.  It's weird how I still want to be friends with people my age, like I am five years old and want another 5-year-old girl to play with.  I have made one awesome new friend, and I already love her, so at least there's that.

I am very tired of "The First Conversation" I have to have with everyone.  You know the one.  It covers these topics:
What's your name? (I have met tons of people and won't remember their names for months.)
Where do you live? (Not helpful info for me when I don't know my way around town.)
Where are you from? (The usual response to this is, "Oh.  That's nice.")

Occasionally I find someone who is really good at small talk, and that's a nice change of pace.  Being new is always hard.  Trying to find new friends is a lot like dating, and it is hard getting past the "1st-Date Phase" of a relationship.  I remember this when I went to grad school.  I actually remember the exact moment I became close friends with my dear friend, Sarah.  She was a class-mate.  At the start of our first Christmas break, we went to Starbucks for hot chocolate and discussed our classes and teachers.  Then a boy I liked walked by.  He and I had an awkward conversation at our table, then he walked away.  Blamo!  Just like that, Sarah and I had something interesting to talk about, and we became eternal friends.

It's just so hard to get past the superficial layers of conversation so much of the time.  It takes a lot of time and effort, and it's going to take a while.  Making friends is so hard.  Thank goodness I have Maggie here.


Gunner and Hobbes are adjusting in their own ways.  I can tell that we have all just come off of our big move.  I'm dealing with behavior issues that aren't necessarily new, but severely magnified.  The boys fight all. the. time.  Gunner picks at Hobbes, Hobbes whines, then I get involved. We repeat this pattern 1 million times per day.  I am exhausted by them.  I wish I could find a way to teach Gunner to be nice to his brother.  I would love them to be good friends and be able to play together, instead of the constant fighting.  Argh, it's so frustrating.

Gunner is actually grounded right now.  He told me to "Shut Up" the other day.  "What did you say to me?!?!?!" I said.  He replied, "I said, Shut Up, Mom."

So, he's grounded.  This is his first real grounding, so he's figuring out what it means day by day.  No TV, no I-Pad games, no popcorn (which is apparently near and dear to his heart), and he has to do 30 minutes of chores every day for a week.  Oh, except that now it's two weeks because he told another kid to Shut Up in Primary on Sunday.  Yikes.  That kid is hitting some milestones I don't think he should hit for another 10 years.  He's growing up too fast, and I'm apparently years behind schedule.  And I'm a bit lost on him.

On the plus side, he has been helping me get my house nice and clean this week.  I think I might not drop the chores after his grounding is over.

Food Feature: Pot Stickers, Lettuce Wraps and Asian Dipping Sauce

Kalie, this one is for you.  In fact, the thought running through my head as I made these was, "Kalie would love these!"  So here you go.  Make them.  Love them.  They are divine.

I dragged my kids out to the local Asian market a couple weeks ago.  It had to be done.  I was struggling to come up with any meals to cook in our new house without some of my new staple Asian ingredients.  The store here isn't as awesome as the one in SLC, but I sort of expected that.  We're in a small town in the Midwest.  But I can get what I need, and I'll take what I can get.  I'm just grateful to have a market in town.  While I was there, I picked up a package of potsticker wrappers and thought I'd give them a go.  Turns out that these are some of my favorite things I have made.

Pork Pot Stickers

Based on this recipe from Martha Stewart

• 1/4 pound ground pork
• 1 tablespoon minced green onions
• 1 1/2 teaspoons soy sauce
• 1 1/2 teaspoons rice wine
• 2-3 tablespoons water chestnuts, minced
• 1 teaspoon minced peeled fresh ginger
• 1/2 teaspoon sesame oil
• 1/2 teaspoon cornstarch
• 20 wonton wrappers (from a 12-ounce package)
• 1 tablespoon vegetable oil
• 
  
• 1. In a bowl, combine pork, onions, soy sauce, sherry, water chestnuts, ginger, sesame oil, cornstarch, and 1 tablespoon water.
  2. Place a heaping teaspoon of pork mixture in center of a wonton wrapper. Lightly wet edge of wrapper, fold over, and press to seal. Repeat to form remaining dumplings (makes 20).
  3. In two batches, cook dumplings in a large pot of boiling water until cooked through, 4 minutes; transfer to a plate with a slotted spoon. In a large nonstick pan, heat vegetable oil over medium-high. In two batches, cook until browned, about 1 1/2 minutes per side. Serve with dipping sauce.
  Freeze raw dumplings on a baking sheet, then store in bags, up to 3 months. Cook from frozen.  Look at all my little dumplings all ready and lined up in a row.  I feel a bit like a proud mommy who got her kids in bed early.

  

  
  

  Serving Suggestions:

  Team these up with Five-Spice Turkey & Lettuce Wraps.  They make an excellent combination because there are a lot of duplicate ingredients between the two recipes, which makes prepping and chopping a whole lot easier.

  And last but not least, here is a recipe for the world's yummiest dipping sauce (pictured above), which also happens to be delicious drizzled over the lettuce wraps.  I may even be tempted to eat this stuff with a spoon.

  Asian Dipping Sauce

  2 T. soy sauce

  1 T. hoisin sauce

  1 T. rice vinegar

  1 T. sesame oil

  1 t. chili sauce (I always use Srirache sauce)
  
  Mix it all together in a bowl.  Store leftovers (if you have any!) in the fridge.  Yum!

Stepping Way Out of My Comfort Zone

I don't know if you all realize this about me, but I'm a back-row sitter.  And I don't give comments.  I may think comments, but I don't say them.  If I ever get up the courage to say something in a class, my face turns red (Thank you, over-active blushing mechanism), then people notice that I'm blushing, so then my neck turns red, too!  It's a domino effect of shame for me.

So I sit in the back row, quietly paying attention (or trying to, let's be honest here), and not ever saying anything at all.

We have been in our new ward for three weeks.  When we moved last year, Spiff and I were asked to talk in Sacrament Meeting on Father's Day, which was two weeks after we moved.  This time, I have been asked to substitute as a Relief Society teacher on Sunday.  Both of these things involve me talking in front of people (cue red blush-face), and talking to people I don't know who will be veeeeery interested in what the new girl has to say (cue red blush-neck).

I used to teach relief society, eight years ago before I married Spiff, in our single's ward.  Back then, I thought it was the perfect calling.  I only had to prepare something once a month.  I got to lead a conversation with my female peers in similar situations on interesting gospel subjects.  I loved it.  Then I got married and started attending family wards where all of the members of the RS came with different stories and perspectives on life.  I realized that it is a place where offense can be taken so very easily by members of the class, from something the teacher said.  Perhaps she wasn't being sensitive enough to everyone's situations.  Perhaps she was naive in her own experiences and made a gross generalization.  Perhaps she was just stating what the Prophet said in the manual.  No matter what, offense was to be taken.

I decided after this that I never wanted to teach RS ever again.

I then got called to work in the primary, where I have been for four years.  I have forgotten how to interact with relief society sisters!  I think it's easier to be with kids.

And here I am, in my brand new ward, teaching this week's lesson, which happens to be on Missionary Work (Lesson 14, George Albert Smith).  This happens to be my most uncomfortable topic to talk about.  I am the worst about sharing the gospel and actually feel completely uncomfortable with it.

Goodness, I'm really at a loss here, folks.  Anyone have any brilliant ideas for me?  Any an all helpful comments and suggestions are welcome here!  Thanks in advance.

Our Move

So, here's how the move went.  And even as I'm typing this, I'm thinking, "Boy, I'm sure glad that's over!"  It's so much work, and we are all still recovering.

We packed up our house with the help of my sister and her girls.  Spiff and Stephanie wrapped furniture in plastic wrap and hauling boxes into the truck, while I ran around finishing the packing and cleaning.  Her girls were amazing!  The oldest, who just turned 13, carried countless boxes out of the depths of the basement up the stairs and outside to the driveway.  The 9-year-old helped keep an eye on the little kids.  It wasn't until later in the afternoon when all of our doors were wide open while we were carrying everything in the house outside that I decided I could not keep track of Hobbes!  I called up Kalie and she most graciously agreed watch him while I waited for my other sister to arrive and take the younger kids away.  Seriously, Kalie, I don't know what I would have done without your help!  Little Hobbes would have been smashed by a furniture dolly without you.

Anyway, the elder's quorum showed up and loaded up the furniture.  The thing about using ABF is that you are charged by the square foot of space you use.  So, we tried to pack everything as densely as possible.  It's like a hunormous (that's Gunner's word) 3-D puzzle.  We did have a few casualties.  The kids' play structure didn't fit.  I'm still a little sad about that.  And we left Gunner's crib behind.  Actually, Spiff tore it apart and used it as packing shims.  I think the rest of it was just used as firewood at my family's annual camping trip.  We bought him an IKEA big-boy bed when we arrived.

So, all said and done, it was the world's longest day.  We were exhausted, but we got it done, and I'm so very grateful for all the help!   Then we said goodbye to our little house and got on the road.  We sure will miss our house, fabulous neighbors, family, friends, mountains, and glorious glorious weather!

We drove through Wyoming this time, instead of heading East on I-80, in order to avoid the longest straight section of road in the country, and the rest of Nebraska, too.  And I didn't regret it for an instant.  Driving north east in Wyoming was wonderful.  It was such a beautiful drive!  In fact, I'm fairly certain that my breath was taken away as we drove past Alcova, WY.  Seriously beautiful country.  You probably have to see it to believe it; the pictures just don't do it justice.

We stayed the night in a fairly excellent hotel in Gillette, WY, and rewarded the boys for their outstanding traveling behavior with a late-night swim in the hotel pool.  We had a good time, were able to relax and stretch out after a long day of driving, but didn't get the kids in bed until after 10:00.  This resulted in a looooooooooong day the next day.

We started off the day by driving to Devil's Tower.  I have never been there, and I thought it was great!  There was a little mile-ish hike that we took the boys on. I thought the kids would be happy to get out of the car, stretch their legs and enjoy a little adventure.  I was wrong.  Well, Hobbes was fine.  Look at him happily hiking along!

Gunner, on the other hand, was awful.  He whined and complained the entire time we walked!  "Are we done yet?"  "Why do we have to BEEEEE here?!"  "I want to go back to the car!"  Etc.

That is, until he found the perfect little gun-sized/shaped stick and started shooting every person who hiked past us.  Good thing most people were good sports about it because he shot every one of them dead.

Devil's Tower = Beautiful

From there, we headed East to Mount Rushmore.  I have also never been there before.  And it was...meh.  I didn't love it.  The Mount was cool.  The history behind it's creation was cool.  The opportunity to get out of the car and walk around was nice.  But I was underwhelmed by the whole place.  Perhaps if Gunner hadn't been whining, or if we had been able to spend more time in the Black Hills instead of just seeing this one sight, perhaps I would have liked it better.  As it stands, I don't think I'll ever return...willingly.

The thing about it was that everything in the whole area was entirely over-commercialized.  There is this one main highway that runs from I-90 down to Mount Rushmore.  There are approximately 30,000 billboards along that highway trying to get you to come in and have FUN at this man-made sight, or more FUN at that man-made water park, or even MORE FUN(!!!) at that museum!  Museum of Gutzon Borglum, who built Mt. Rushmore (that's understandable).  Museum of Reptiles.  Museum of Birds.  Museum of Bob Loblaw.  There just isn't enough natural fun to be had in that part of the country that they have to man-make it, and they have to cram it all down your throat as you drive by.  I wanted to see the sights and enjoy the area, and it was ruined for me by all the man-made stuff.  I guess I'm completely spoiled growing up in the West where there is no lack of splendid natural beauty to be had.  What South Dakota had to offer paled in comparison.

Oh, that then there was Rapid City.  After touring around those two sights all day, we decided to stay the night in Rapid City.  We must have just hit the wrong parts of town, and I hope we did because otherwise that place is a dump!  Our Garmin landed us at a park in the Ghetto, we ate dinner at a Subway where all of the workers behind the counter were missing some teeth, and we could not find a hotel room for under $230/night.  What?!  I know.  That's insanity!  We decided that there must have been an event and that the hotels were hiking their rates because the nice hotels at Snowbird Resort, you know, the ones that you can ski to the lift from your hotel room door...they don't charge much more than that to stay there.

We were tired and hungry, but we decided that there was something wrong with Rapid City, so we meandered down the highway to Wall.  Yes, we stayed the night in Wall, SD, home of the made-famous-by-billboard-advertising Wall Drug!  I feel so honored, and grateful to stay at an inexpensive Econolodge.  Thank you, Wall.

The next day found us at the Corn Palace in Mitchell, SD.  The Corn Palace!!!  Look at the link for pictures of the outside of this landmark.  Here's one of the inside.  It's entirely decorated by corn.  Pretty neat.  This place was the home for us of a nice stretch of our legs and a picnic lunch.  Not much more than that.

So from there, we drove to Minneapolis to stay with our gracious friends who put us up for a few nights until our ABF truck finally delivered our stuff to our house.  It took two days longer than we had hoped.  We will probably not use ABF again, unless we are planning a week or longer vacation in the mean time.  It was a big time waster and frustrating to feel like we were in limbo.  Oh, than then there was a monsoon that arrived and dumped rain on us for the evening.  We had to postpone the elder's quorum another day.  More delays.  But even in the rain, Spiff and our good friend, Dan, unloaded boxes in the rain, saved some books and the piano from rain water that had gotten into the truck, and we were on our way to getting settled in our new house.

Spiff has since started his new job.  It's good and hard for him at the same time.  The kids and I have enjoyed being reunited with Maggie and her kids!!!!  Not enough exclamation points for that one.  Gunner has a new friend from church.  I have met some nice people, but it sure is hard being the new girl again.  We miss what we had, and change is hard, but we're slowly slowly slowly getting there.

Introducing...

Spiff's Father's Day Present!!!

He picked it out after we got here.  It's no Weber, but it sure does cook up some delicious burgers.

And Spiff's not half bad at grilling.  Not half bad at all.

Our New House

Alright, so we made it!  We survived the move.  We're here in our new home, and we're working on getting settled.  Very slowly.  It sure does take a long time.  I think we're all ready for a new normal routine and ready for some rest.  I'll going to try to make a bigger effort to blog, and I'll do some catch-up posts.  But for now, here are some rare picture!  Hoorah!  Enjoy!

Our house, and our little car, which is proof that we live here

It's a ranch-style with a walk-out basement.

My kitchen

Ah, my kitchen.  It's big, beautiful, and the appliances are a dream.

It turns out that the majority of the possessions we own are kitchen items.  There were more kitchen boxes than Spiff and my other things combined.  And this kitchen accommodates them all.

I'm a lucky girl. 

View of the dining room from the kitchen

Look at all that space!

View of the living room from the balcony

 Kitchen window and the porch that comes out from the dining room.

The boys love running in wild circles on the deck.

The yard and back of the house.

It's lovely, no?  I am certainly in love.

Lindsey's Birthday Cake

We are moving in a week and a half!  It doesn't seem possible.  It's exciting, terrifying, overwhelming, and heart-wrenching for me.  But as we near our move-date, we're slowly getting things done, and I'm feeling better about things.  I got our car checked out for long-distance travel.  I have called utility companies.  We have our moving truck scheduled.  I sold our washer and dryer over the weekend.  I listed it in the local online classifieds early, just in case it took a while to sell, and I had three calls on it almost immediately.  A lady picked it up the next day.  It's good to have that taken care of, but knowing how quickly they sold, I wish I had waited another week.  I don't know how to do things without a washing machine, especially with my messy kids.

Today, though, I took a break from all that.  We went to church, and it was lovely.  It felt relaxed and uplifting for the first time all year.  And I made a birthday cake for a friend.  It felt so nice to do something creative and not related to packing, moving, cleaning, or kids, just for a little while.

Just a few notes about the cake (again, these notes are mostly for me, but are here for anyone who is interested).  I used the same cake recipe as the purse cake.  It works well because it is very dense.  I didn't make buttercream.  Instead, I used dark and white chocolate ganache to both fill and cover the cake.  I loved it!  I loved working with it so much that I may not ever make buttercream frosting again.  The ganache itself didn't take long to make, and it is very smooth and easy to work with.  The trick is to wait for it to be the right temperature to spread.  Not too warm or cold.  I made it the night before and put it in the fridge.  Next time, I'll take it out of the fridge early in the morning to give it more time to come to room temperature.  This three-layer, 8" cake took 13.6 oz. dark chocolate (2 large Hershey bars), 16 oz. white chocolate baking chips, and 10.8 oz. heavy cream.

I tried the Upside Down Frosting Technique to fill and cover the cakes this time, which is a new technique for me.  It went great until I got to the very end, 99% done, and I went to peel the parchment paper off the top of the cake, and it was completely stuck to the ganache.  It took all the ganache off the top of the cake with it.  Bummer!  I threw a small fit (poor Spiff has to witness these every time I do a project like this, since I can never do a project without some kind of a major hiccup).  Then I pulled myself together and replaced the ganache on the top of the cake.  It ended up being fine.  I'm just disappointed that the new technique didn't work as smoothly as I wanted it to.  I also wish I knew what went wrong.  I have no idea how to fix it next time.

Here's a picture of the cake after I finished covering it with ganache.  It's sort of marbled because of using both white and dark chocolate.  Notice how straight and smooth the sides are!  Notice how cylindrical it is!  I did like that technique.  I just need to iron out that one small detail about the top.  

Ogden Marathon 2012

I ran a marathon.  It was amazing beyond belief.  I want to remember every moment of the run, so here's a recap.

I went to bed way too late gathering my things, couldn't get to sleep because of pre-race jitters and my brain imagining every possible scenario of race-day, and then my alarm went off at 3:20 a.m.  I hopped in the car, picked up my sisters, Steph & Lori, and my girl, Kalie, and drove to Ogden where we met up with the masses of other crazy early risers who make us feel so much less crazy for putting ourselves through all of these early running hours, cold temperatures, and running pains.  We loaded a bus and drove to the start line.  As we drove further and further and further, I kept wondering how in the world I was going to be able to run all the way back.  What a long ride!

We waited in the 36 degree weather at the start line for about an hour before the race started.  I was so badly shivering with cold and nerves that I decided to keep my jacket during the run, a decision I regretted two miles into the race when the sun came out and I had my jacket tied around my waist for the entire run.  I would have ditched it on the side of the road had it not been my absolute favorite jacket.

The minutes close to 7:00 rolled around, and we made our way with the masses to our individual pace groups.  Saying goodbye and good luck to Kalie and Lori made me nervous, and I ran every step with them on my mind, wondering how they were doing.  I lined up with Steph with the 4:15 group.  Then we were off!

As we began running, I was struck by the beauty of the experience.  The early misty morning air.  The rocky hills around us.  The masses of bouncing runner's heads that completely filled the road ahead of us as far as I could see.  It was all so beautiful!

My strategy for the run was to stay by Stephanie's side.  This was her 4th marathon and I relied on her experience to get me through the training and race day.  She was my vet and my rock.  I cannot imagine running 26.2 miles without her.

My fueling strategy was to carry a clif bar and sport beans in my hands, munching them along the way.  Steph and I were also going to walk through every water stop to hydrate.  I ate so much that morning because I was terrified of running out of energy!

At mile 2, I admitted to Steph that I my hip was hurting with every step I took, but I was going to try not to complain about it.

At mile 7, we ran a section of road that wound around a field of horses.  We could see a stream of runners ahead of us, and the horses were running with us.  They came right up to the fence by us, looked at us, and then raced off ahead, as if to say, "You runners are awesome, but we're still faster than you!"  They looked like they were having so much fun!

The time began to move, and I was surprised at how quickly the miles ticked off.  The first 13 were practically a breeze.  We kept the 4:15 Pacer's balloons in sight until we stopped at the bathrooms at the halfway point.  We made a quick stop, but never saw those darn balloons again.

It was at that point, as we started up again, that I realized how much pain I was in.  My whole body was tired and much more sore than I hoped I would be this early in the race.  My injured leg hurt so much to start running again that I probably should have stopped.  But I didn't want to.  So I kept running.  I knew that if I could just get going that I would be able to finish.  I just couldn't stop to walk again.  That meant that I jogged slowly through the remaining water stops, and I sloshed Poweraid down my face and clothes every time.

Mile 17 was one of my hardest.  It was hilly, sunny, and seemed to go on forever.  During this mile, we chatted with a guy who was running his 41st marathon, his 3rd this year.  He is doing another one in three weeks.  It was an inspirational little push to get me to the 18 mile mark.

We passed the 18 mile marker, crossed the dam, and headed down the canyon.  It was beautiful beyond belief, but Steph and I both found it difficult to swith to downhill running.  My quads started burning at this point.  Steph didn't say anything about it, but her knee started to really hurt her with the downhill.  Good thing it wasn't very steap for very long.

I did a little dance inside when I passed the 20-mile mark.  It had previously been the farthest I had ever run.  Everything that was left was a PR in my book.

At mile 21, I found myself thinking, "I am almost done with my first marathon!  I cannot believe that I only have 5 miles left.  I can't believe I'm almost done."

At mile 23, we came out of the canyon and ran on a hilly greenbelt the last three miles back into Ogden.  Steph began to tire out.  She continued out plan to walk through the water stops.  I couldn't stop running, and found myself getting a few steps ahead of her.  I thought about continuing on without her to the end, but stopped myself.  We were in this together.  We had run every step together, and we were going to finish together.  She caught up, and we continued on our way together.

The route from here to the end was packed with people on the sidelines cheering on the runners.  Our names were printed on our bibs, and it was such an awesome little boost to hear someone I didn't know call out my name and cheer me on individually.  They have no idea how much they helped me to the finish line.

Mile 25 was the hardest and the longest.  I had carried food in my hand the entire way and still had a bag of sport beans and a small clif bar.  My hands were swollen, and I thought about tossing them at the 25-mile water stop, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.  What a waste, I thought!  But at 25.5, I just couldn't hold them anymore.  I tossed them on the side of the road!  And then I cheered myself for making a frivolous and wasteful decision!

The course turned the final corner, and I rejoiced when I saw the finish line.  Steph and I crossed the finish line hand-in-hand at 4:25.  It was 10 minutes off our goal, but I knew that we had both given everything we had, and I am as proud as can be of that finish time.  I had a feeling of overwhelming glee to have just finished my first marathon!  Amazing!

Then I made it through the little finisher's shoot to the grassy area, lied down on the grass and didn't move for an hour while we waited for Lori to come in.  During that time, I got the chills (a lot like I do after I have a baby...in fact, I can compare the whole experience to labor!), and my whole body set up.  My legs have been more sore than they ever have been in my life (do you remember the burning quads on the downhill?), and my silly injury is pretty bad.  I fought nausea from the pain of walking and ended up in the medics tent, which made me feel like a total pansy.

I also got really emotional.  It took so much out of me that I couldn't think about the experience, my sisters and their hard work, Kalie and her successes, my friend Lindsay who showed up to cheer me on (even though I never found her) without choking up.  It is a truly soul-reaching experience.

But I finished.  I'm glad I did it, even though the past three days of recovery have been some of my hardest ever.  Thank goodness for my wonderful parents who have watched my children while I have been practically immobile!  I think I would have always wondered and regretted it if I had decided not to do it, even though it definitely wasn't the best thing for my leg.  I wouldn't trade the experience for anything.  Thank you to everyone who made it possible for me.
And I can't wait to do another one.

Marathon Tomorrow!

Well, because I know you're all dying to know, here's a little update before the marathon tomorrow.

Did I just say "tomorrow"?  I did, didn't I?  Oh, gosh, that's scary. 

Okay, moving on.

It has been a tough couple of weeks.  I was so sore last week.  I literally limped for most of the week, with shooting pains up into my groin every time I took a step or stood directly on my left leg.  Difficult to take care of the kids, put on my pants, care for my house, or anything else.  I cried all week long, seeing this goal of mine being taken away from me after working so hard because of something that I didn't understand.  And poor Spiff, since he was working nights all week long, I only saw him for about 5 minutes each day, and I cried at him for all 5 minutes every day.

Gunner asked me what was wrong one day.  I told him that my leg hurt, and that I didn't think I would be able to run my marathon.  The sweet guy replied, "It's okay.  It's going to be okay, Mom.  I'm going to run your marathon for you."

I love him.
Anyway, I saw a sports medicine doctor on Monday.  He did some ex-rays and an exam.  It was inconclusive.  He didn't think it's a pulled or torn muscle.  He couldn't see anything on the ex-ray.  He did say that he thinks it's probably the beginnings of a stress fracture in my hip bone, but it's new enough that it doesn't show up on the picture.  Scary thought, the stress fracture.

He did tell me that I can run the marathon as long as I'm smart about it and am listening to my body.  Too much pain = stop running.

I went on a short test-run yesterday.  It was okay.  I didn't feel perfectly better, but I wasn't in pain.  Mostly just stiff.  And I have felt okay since then.  So, I'm going to run tomorrow, and I'm hoping for the best.  I feel weird going into it not having really trained for the past three weeks, and knowing that there is a good possibility that I won't finish.  But I'm going to give it my best shot, try to be in tune with my body, and hope for the best.

My sweet sister-in-law has been so nice to me through all of this, calling and checking up on me, etc., and she dedicated her latest blog post to me yesterday.  It made me smile.  Thanks, Mhana!  And if I end up dropping out, I will be expecting that shirt.

Wish me luck!  Here we go!

The Bad and the Ugly

Spiff is on his second surgery rotation right now, and he is working nights this week. Nights shifts are hard on the whole family. The pressure to be quiet all day so daddy can sleep is very stressful for me and the kids. And Spiff is so tired. Poor guy.

Hobbes is not sleeping at night these days. Again. Sleep training is miserable every time.

Gunner is recovering from Spiff's family togetherness reunion and a second fun weekend spent with my family. He is so tired, and he is reaching new heights of grumpiness and defiance.

We're moving in 5 1/2 weeks, and I haven't had the energy to even think about packing.  I don't want to pack up my house again.

My marathon is in a week and a half, and I'm battling a new injury. I rested for a week, without many healing results. I am frustrated, disheartened, sad and afraid. My whole training has gone so well up until now. In fact, our last 20 mile run was the best run of my life. And now I am in constant pain. I want to run this marathon. I can't fathom the thought of not doing it. My goal from the beginning has been to run well, feel good, and finish strong. Now I am facing the possibility that I will be running with pain, and that I might not be running at all if I can't get better in the next week. It is killing me, and I am constantly praying for a miraculous recovery as I limp around taking care of the kids.

And I feel like I'm coming down with a cold.

Hard days right now. Blah.  Anyone have any words of encouragement for me?

Mhana's Purse Cake

I made my sissy-in-law this purse cake and shoe for her birthday.  We had a rare occasion to celebrate her day together, so I went all out on the cake.  Fun, huh?!  It was so fun surprising her with it.  She loved it and it made all of the effort totally worth it.  I have posted pictures on facebook, but I wanted to write out a few of the details, in case anyone is interested, but mostly for my reference.

The Cake:
Mhana requested chocolate cake with chocolate frosting.  I used this recipe for the cake.  It's a recipe to gussy up a regular box cake mix and make it more sturdy and easier to shape and carve.  The recipe calls for vanilla-flavored everything, but you can use any flavor w/ the corresponding pudding flavor.

I filled the cake layers with chocolate buttercream frosting. (You just have to scroll down and look for the powdered-sugar-based buttercream recipe.)  One weird thing: the recipe calls for 3 T. vanilla!  Do not use 3 T. vanilla!  It will change the texture of the frosting entirely, and then you'll have to add twice as much powdered sugar to fix it.  I only put in 1 teaspoon, and it was fine. 

I topped the cake with chocolate ganache. (Again, scroll down and find the ganache section.)  It was my first time making ganache, and I will definitely try it again.  It's very versatile.  It can be poured over the cake while it's thin and warm, spread over the cake while it's slightly cooler, or used as filling between the layers when it is even cooler.

I used this tutorial to make the purse cake.  She gives very detailed instructions on how to do it, and it's a whole lot easier than I thought it would be.  I wish mine looked as good as hers, but for my first one, I don't think it turned out too bad at all.

The cake is covered in marshmallow fondant.

The brown details on the purse are made of modeling chocolate, rolled into pipes.  My sister made the flowers.

The Shoe:
I found a pattern I liked online, printed it out, made the heel, then rolled and cut out the pieces of modeling chocolate.  Then the pieces are place together in the shape you want them using water to hold them together.  Piece of cake!  Well, it would have been if my modeling chocolate had set up like it should have.  It never really did fully set, although I don't know why.  Too much corn syrup and not enough chocolate?  I don't know.  But I did create a very elaborate support system for the shoe to sit on and dry for several days before giving it to the Sis.

What I learned:
Making cakes it time consuming.  I liked it, but I will like it even more if I am more prepared next time.  I will read up on any techniques I want to use in advance, and I will make the fondant, modeling chocolate, ganache, and frosting several days ahead of time.

Gunner got into the cake-making spirit while I did this.  He played "Cake Boss."  He squished and rolled out fondant like play dough, and he made a Shark Cake.  It was really just three oval-ish pieces of pink fondant squished onto the table, but to him, it was a monster-sized Cake-Boss-Style cake with a life-sized moveable shark coming out of the center.  It was pretty awesome.  The kid's got talent, for sure.

Short and Sweet

Gunner came running in from playing outside at my sister's house tonight after falling and hurting his nose. He was scraped up, bleeding a little, and very upset. After cleaning him up, comforting and calming him, I asked him how he got hurt.

 His reply: "I was climbing the porch fence, and it had strong powers and bucked me off."


 I sure do love him and his cuteness.

My Book About Marathon Training

As most of my faithful friends know, I am training for my first full marathon. It's very exciting for me because it's something I have wanted to do for several years, and I also never really thought I could actually run such long distances. But I am deep in training, in the middle of week 15 of a 19-week training program. We are in our toughest month, and I want to write down some thoughts about all of this while I am up to my neck in marathon training. (This is such a long and wordy post! I realize I have been doing a lot of that lately, and I promise to come up with something short and sweet soon.)

1. I am training with awesome people, and I know without a doubt that I would not be able to achieve this goal during Spiff's Intern Year without the help of so many beloved people. My neighbor, Kalie, is my dedicated partner. As previously mentioned, we run together throughout the week, pushing our kids in stollers. She is my rock. She is dedicated, committed, and Fast! She is positive, strong, and such an inspiration to me. She has also been kind enough to offer her treadmill for interval and tempo runs when the need has come. And she has watched my children so that I can run. I don't think I will ever be able to train for another marathon again without her by my side.

I am also training with my sisters. One is running her first marathon, like me. The other is a marathon vet. This will be her fourth marathon, and I am leaning completely on her experience as we have traversed distances I have never done before. I am also dependent on the help of her family, who have graciously offered to help tend my children while we run 2, 3, or 4-hour Saturday long runs together. More often than not, Spiff is working on Saturday mornings, and the boys and I have been spending Friday nights at my sister's house so that I can run with the group while her husband and kids have helped with my boys. It's so generous of them that I feel I will never be able to repay them. Because of their help, I am able to achieve my goal when my husband is unavailable, and enjoy time with my sisters and dear friend in the short time I am living near them.

2. I am marveling at how the process of marathon training works. After my first 17-mile run, a good friend, with whom I have run 3 half-marathons, asked me, "What does it feel like to run that distance?!" My response was that it doesn't feel all that different from running 13 miles because of the process. The program builds us up to the distances, and so our bodies and minds are ready for whatever distance we are scheduled to run that day. None of them are ever easy, but some of the longer runs (say 15 miles) actually feel easier to me than a 3-mile run because of the tricks my mind plays on me. I expect a three-mile run to feel easy and be over quickly, but it is still a 30-minute run, which is not an insignificant amount of time. But when I'm all geared up to stick it out for the long-haul, my mind takes it in stride and it almost feels like it's over before it starts. I can't wrap my head around it, and I really don't understand why it is that way.

3. I love being in really good shape! For several of our interval training runs, I went up to a local high school and ran on their track. I haven't done any serious running on a track since I was in high school. I was a fast runner as a kid, but I was never in very good shape. I always wanted to run long distances, but I never thought I could run anything over two miles. So I was a sprinter. I liked the 100 and 200m distances. The 400m sprint killed me. I remember feeling like every muscle in my body had been drained of energy by the time I hit the last straightaway (always in front of the crowd sitting in the bleachers) and that I might literally die (or pee my pants, whatever came first) running the last 100m. I just didn't have a base level of fitness that could get me through that long of a sprint.

Our program included 8 weeks of 400m intervals, starting with 6 reps and working our way up to 16 reps! It was intense, and definitely a battle of wills and endurance for me. But the thing that got me while I ran on the track is that I am strong! I could easily run a 400 lap (and by easy I mean that I didn't have that feeling like my muscles were all suddenly deflated like a balloon), recover quickly, and then do it again and again and again. I am in such better shape as a 32-year-old woman than I ever was as a teenage girl, or anytime in my 20s for that matter. It was an exhilarating realization.

On the flip side of that, I was caught running on the track a few times with some of the high school students doing their track workouts. (I stayed in the outside lane and tried to be as invisible as possible.) I tell you, there is nothing that can make me feel more like a slow old woman than running next to the varsity cross-country team. Their easy run was faster than my all-out sprint!

4. We have endured all kinds of weather throughout this training. The program started in January, so we have run in cold, wind, snow, rain, and everything in between. I don't think I did a track workout when it wasn't so windy that I didn't have to fight a serious headwind on the straightaway. I also got caught in a bonafide blizzard during a track workout. I watched the storm come in, and it started snowing when I was only done with 6 of 16 laps. So I ran the remaining 10 in a snowy, windy blizzard. That's when I realized my dedication to this sport.

5. I have become acquainted with various new ways of taking care of my tired and achy body. My post-long run ritual includes a piping hot chocolate while I sit in an ice bath (gasp!), then a good long time stretching and rolling out my legs on my rolling pin (since I don't have a foam roller). All of this, added to the time it takes to get ready for a long run, travel to where we're meeting, and run means that I am sometimes committed to the Saturday long run for 5-6 hours. And then I'm toasted for the rest of the day, so I can't go too fast or too far during our Saturday activities, and I usually need a nap, too. I have to give kudos to my family for supporting me. They are awesome!

6. And finally, I just have to say how much I love this sport. I love to run. I love being in training and having a set schedule to adhere to. I love long runs. I love being in tune with the elements. I love exploring the city on foot and seeing things I wouldn't see if I'm driving in my car. I love spending time with such good people. I love working hard for this goal, through every painful step.

We ran our first 20-mile run last Saturday. It went well, for the most part, although I was battling sore feet, knees and hips starting at mile 5. As I muddled through mile 19 1/2, I thought to myself, "I'm so tired and sore, I don't know if I could run another 6 miles!" It sort of seems impossible at this point. But my sister reminded me that Mile 20 is "The Wall." It is the point at which so many people think they cannot go on, and then they make it through and finish. I just need to trust the process and have faith that I will be ready on Marathon Day.

Here's hoping that I will be.

***And just for the record, here is what my other little training partners look like while we run! All snuggled up in their coats, hoods, gloves, blankets, heated rice bags, and rain cover. They are my little champs! Gunner will even occasionally cheer me on, "Go, Mama, Go!" He has started asking me when we get up in the morning, "Is it running day?" And, "Are you running with or without kids?" I love my little running buddies!